butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
