I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
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