do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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