Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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