The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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