oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I pour the whiskey from now on
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
