We won't sleep together?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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