Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
