Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
