And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
