Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
you made out with another girl for some wings
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
