can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
