I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
