To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
