The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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