and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I got inside last night via doggy door
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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