I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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