i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You're a waste of cheezeits
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
