Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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