I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
