And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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