There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
