You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'm sobbing to NWA
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
