the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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