My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
