i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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