I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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