question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
