Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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