It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
