I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
