I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize