I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
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