It's just like the Real World with babies
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
