We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
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