why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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