i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
