The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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