After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
