You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
