i jhust puked up my retainher.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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