just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
