addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
