Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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