Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Randomize
