Me too!
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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