ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
