You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
