"it" just moved
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
