I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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